Sunday, April 27, 2008

not a cat person.

My dad is not a cat person. He really is not an animal person in general. My cat, however, loves my dad, who surreptitiously pet him a few times just now and thought I didn't notice. Kitty got wicked pumped and purred.

Dad: [pulling hand back quickly, startled] What is that noise?
Me: The cat purring.
Dad: No, it's really loud. And it sounds like something's vibrating. Like a cell phone.
Me: Yes, Dad, that is the cat.
Dad: No! That sound! What is that sound?? Is the bouncy chair turned on?
Me: [irritatedly] OH MY GOD. The cat is purring! I just said that! The. Cat. Is. Purring.
Dad: The CAT is doing that?
Me: Yes. He's purring.
Dad: But why? Why is he making that sound??
Me: Cats purr when they're happy!
Dad: Huh.

Good grief.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

today's chuckle.

Yesterday my friend D came over. The two of us took Bee and two other friends for a walk. It was really, REALLY warm and we thought we'd stop by the local ice cream place. D was so cute about Bee - he didn't want to put her down, even for a second, and worried about what she would have since I said she couldn't have ice cream.

(Side note: why do people act like I'm mean for not letting my 4-month-old eat ice cream? They aren't supposed to have dairy for some months yet, people!)

D: What about Bumblebee? Did you bring her anything?
Me: Anything for... what?
D: Something to drink, like a little cup with water?
Me: Oh, she doesn't need water. Breastmilk is 88% water, so she doesn't need anything else.
D: Oh. Did you bring her any milk?
Me: The milk's in my breasts. And I brought my breasts....
D: Oh. Well, that was very responsible of you!

Thursday, April 3, 2008

high on jesus

At the surgeon's office yesterday, country music - which I don't listen to at all - was playing. Bee loved it. "High on Jesus" by Kinky Friedman was her favorite. It will now be stuck in my head for all eternity. It's that kind of song.

I told Dude about it, and he said in a deadpan voice, "A Kentucky man was arrested yesterday for driving under the influence of Jesus."

Maybe you had to be there. It was funny.

(And, I don't need surgery. I had an evaluation because my back has been really awful, and it's just getting worse.)